THEME
What the...? - PART 1

BEST. SURVIVOR. EPISODE. EVER.

It's dark at the Drake tribe and out of the darkness you hear a booming "Who the hell voted for me? Who the hell voted for me? JON??? Who the hell voted for me?" It's Rupert and he's going after pissant Jon for voting for him at Tribal Council. Rupert is pissed, but he gets over it. How the hell is Jon still around??? The next day it's raining and Morgan looks like they're in bad shape. They haven't been getting any fish since rupert left. They're eating beans. Osten looks like he's checking out again. The damn bastard looks like he's tired and depressed... and like he wants to quit. Drake finds Tree Mail (or Sea Mail as they say) and they realize that there's a challenge coming up. The tribe decides they want coconut popcorn before the challenge (if you fry-up coconut meat it's supposed to taste like popcorn). Everybody except Shawn, that is. More verbal sparring ensues between Jon & Shawn about the damn coconut popcorn.

It's time for the challenge. When the tribes arrive, Jeff starts to talk:

Nineteen days, you've been out here in the Pearl Islands. You have survived the bugs, the lack of food, miserable living conditions and the ever shifting tribal dynamics. Together, you've voted six people out of this game - three from Morgan, three from Drake. The reasons you voted these people out vary. The only real common trait among the six people you voted out is that they're no longer in this game.

But that may soon change.

Morgan, Drake - your past has come back to haunt you.

Come in, guys.

And with that, you see the six former players literally come out of the bushes. They have purple bandannas and Burton is carrying a purple banner.

The six people you have voted out return now as a third tribe.

Nicole. Skinny Ryan. Lill. Burton. Michelle. and Trish.

You guys have a tribe name?

(Burton replies) "We're The Outcasts."

The Outcasts. Not unlike the pirate days, they got tired of somebody, felt they were no longer worthy, they shipped them out to sea - left them for dead. Typically, they died. But every so often, they didn't, and when they came back they usually had one thing on their mind. I'm guessing it's the same with you. Michelle?

(Michelle replies) "Revenge, baby. All about revenge."

The music comes up. Close-up shots of the existing tribe members' faces. And... commercial.

When we come back from the break, Jeff describes how this will work: (why is it that when they show Jon, he's always got that smile on his face that makes me want to smash him in the teeth to get rid of it?) the Outcasts will compete against Morgan and Drake in a Three-Tribe Challenge. If Morgan or Drake lose to the Outcasts, they will have to go to Tribal Council tonight and vote somebody out. The Outcasts will go to Tribal Council and vote somebody in to replace the member you lost. If both tribes lose to the Outcasts, both will go to Tribal Council separately, both will vote somebody out and two Outcasts will come back into the game. If any Outcasts make it back into this game, they are Immune at the next Tribal Council to give them a fair shot at integrating with their new tribe and getting back into this game.

The challenge is a rescue to get out of three different cages. It's a bit convoluted, so I won't go into details. From the start, The Outcasts take the lead, but Drake gets ahead. When it comes down to the end and getting a key ring with a pole, the Outcasts get the keys first and win. Drake and Morgan have to go to Tribal Council and vote people out, while the Outcasts vote two people back into the game for the first time in the history of Survivor. Holy crap, this is going to get interesting...

The tribes go back to camp, and everybody at Morgan feels the same way - the Outcasts must go at the first opportunity, ans everyone is frustrated. Then Osten tells everyone to vote him off. His body isn't functioning as well as he would like, so he can't compete as well, so he wants out. Huh? Have you looked at this guy??? What the hell is wrong with you, Osten? At Drake, a purple crab is crawling around their shelter (Hmmmm... purple? The color of the Outcast Tribe? Coincidence?) Sandra asks for volunteers to go home. To no one's surprise, nobody volunteers. Rupert, Christa and Sandra talk among themselves and Sandra says they should just ask the other two (Jon & Shawn) to make their case on why they should stay (!) and they agree!

Drake goes to Tribal Council first and votes off Shawn Cohen, the 28-year-old advertising sales executive from New York, New York, in a four-to-one decision.

Morgan then goes to Tribal Council. The weather has turned nasty - it's raining with lightning and thunder with heavy winds.

We are now treated to another historic moment in Survivor history - something called "laying down your torch":

Jeff: Well Drake has been here and gone. They were lucky with the weather. Unfortunately, you're not. Been a while since you guys have been here. Had a nice run. Savage - what happened when you guys got back to camp? Suddenly you're faced with an unexpected Tribal Council and you're going to have to vote somebody out.

Andrew: Soon as we get back to camp, Osten steps forward, says that his mind and his body have shut down and that he needs to go. He can't take it another day. Absolutely insists that we put his name on the parchment and vote him out tonight.

Jeff: You had enough, Osten?

Osten: Ah... going into this I was like I want to go as far as my body would allow me go. And right now, my body is done. It's exasperated. (ed. huh?) Every bone in my body hurts. Ahh... I just can't go any further. I'll be more of a liability than an asset to my team, and I refuse to do that.

Jeff: Savage - how much of this experience is about finding out what you are made of?

Andrew: It's all about that, Jeff. It's all mental. Your mind controls your body. If your body is shutting down it's because you... in my opinion... it's because your mind is shutting down.

Jeff: OK. So, Osten, your body, although it appears to smack anybody's body that's still left in this game (shot of Tijuana smiling), I would argue probably that your mind has had enough as well. So, when you hear a guy like Burton come back and say today "You don't know what down is until you've been humiliated by being voted out," and yet he still has a burning desire enough to be back in this game that he'll risk it again, is there any part of you that questions your own will to go on when your body may be saying "I'm tired"?

Osten: Absolutely not. I equate my temple to a car. (yes, Osten refers to his body as a temple) If it has no gas it can not run.

Jeff: T - from what I gathered at the 2nd Tribal Council, it was Osten who was the mysterious person that wanted to quit. So this goes back to Day 5 or 6. What's going on from your point of view right now with Osten?

Tijuana: Um, I can't dictate to Osten or understand where he's coming from. This experience may not be enough of a sacrifice for him versus his health. It is for me. I'm willing to go until probably I'm dead here - either that or I'm voted out. But that's just me.

Jeff: Darrah - I'm watching your body shrink by the day - pulling your top up, nothing staying on. You want out of this game?

Darrah: No, I do not want out of this game. Like T said, you know, I guess you'll have to carry me away, because I'm going to leave this game until I have to.

Jeff: Rhino - What's your take on this happening tonight? Is it "You know what? Fine, Osten, you wanted to quit twice. Go home."

Ryan O: As far as I'm concerned, if was me, I would be clawing and scratching and have to have pneumonia and stuff but, you know, Osten is going to do his thing. That's... that's his wishes. I'm going to grant him his wishes.

Jeff: So, I'm going to go back to you, Osten. I think you know I'm not picking on you.

Osten: That's fine, if you are.

Jeff: So when you hear your four other tribemates, who obviously adore you, when you hear them say "I wouldn't quit. Not for nothn', Jeff", you can't tell me, somewhere in the back of your mind, there's a little part of that says "I am quitting"?

Osten: Take it for whatever you want. mean, if you want to say "quitting", you want to say "stopping". Yeah, I'm "quitting". My health to me is more important to me... ah... than a million dollars I guess right now. Does the means justify the ends? No, it doesn't.

Jeff: Let me ask you something, Osten. Have you wondered what the hell you're doing out here?

Osten: You know what? I'm clearly out of my element. As a situation I would of thought that hey, give it a shot. I can at least say that I went and tried it. I'd like to have been successful. Apparently I'm not going to be. But you know, I won't live my life saying "what if?".

Jeff: Savage - you're shaking your head.

Andrew: If were to do this I would have a "what if?" Flat out. What if what if I went another two days. What if I went one more day. And, then but that's just me. I don't pretend to walk in his shoes, Jeff. I can't... understand what he's going through. It's his decision.

Jeff: Well, Osten - I don't pretend to know what you're thinking either, but I know this: I've been to about a hundred Tribal Councils. Never, ever seen anybody lay down their torch. So, this is a first for me. Seems unanimous. I just want to make sure. Savage - you're going to indulge Osten, sending him home?

Andrew: Yes.

Jeff: Darrah?

Darrah: Yeah.

Jeff: Rhino?

Ryan O.: Yep.

Jeff: T?

Tijuana: Yes.

Jeff: No need to vote and waste any more time. Grab your torch>

(Osten grabs his torch and places it into the ceremonial holder. We then hear Jeff say something he never said before at Tribal Council)

Jeff: Osten - per your wishes - (he snuffs-out the torch) Go home.

(Osten leaves the Tribal Council area. Jeff pulls his torch out of the holder and throws it to the ground)

Jeff: All due respect to Osten, people work too damn hard to get in this game and fight to stay alive. If he wants to lay his torch down so it shall be.

Jeff: Who knows maybe this is the best thing to happen to the Morgan Tribe. All I know is you will head back to camp. Soon after, a new tribe member will arrive and I can promise you this: that person wants to be in this game.

Jeff: Grab your torches, head on back. Good night.

And with that, Osten Taylor, the 27-year-old equity trade manager from Boston, Massachusetts, becomes the first quitter in the history of Survivor.

Remember I had mentioned that Jeff Probst mentioned that there would be a big regret in this game. This was it.

Later, Mark Burnett in a print interview said that he had only made one mistake in casting Survivor over all these years - it was Osten.

Osten, unlike Shawn, was not given the privilege of recording any parting remarks.

Best. Episode. Ever.

Part II is next week.